Dance with the Daughter
by Articfreezer
Summary: So you know, Valk Beth be walking all diggety in the Nadir woods lookin for a Yigg diesel hert or sumthin when suddenly Patricia! But hao? idk! Also mah boi Vitos is in this story HOMIEE


Beth walked across some unknown part of Kartina, still looking for the Yggdrasil's heart. Maybe one of the squirrel people things had mistaken it for an acorn or something.

She had been having no luck and was now sadly wandering around a silent forest without any real purpose at all. She wondered, what was she going to do now?

Suddenly a flash of light lit up the forest, reflecting off the trees and blinding her eyes. Beth shielded her eyes in surprise, not knowing what was going on. The light faded away and Beth blinked.

A blonde girl with horns on her head stood in front of her, her blue eyes wide.

"MOM?!"

Beth's mouth dropped open. She looked around for a sign of another person but there was no one in sight. She came to the conclusion that the girl was addressing...her?

The girl took in Beth and a wide smile spread across her face. Suddenly she jumped in for a hug.

"Wha-?"

"Mom! You're alive! My time machine worked!"

Beth stood there awkwardly as the random blonde hugged her. It was doing her no harm, so she had time to think. Those horns, they seemed familiar. But she was certain she had never met this girl before. Was she a devil?

"Mom!" The girl muffled repeatedly in her chest. She trembled a little and Beth soon realized she was crying. Not knowing what to do, she stroked the girl's horns, hoping she would eventually calm down.

It seemed to work. The girl settled down and finally backed away.

"Sorry," she sniffled. "I guess you don't even know who I am. Let me introduce myself properly. I'm your daughter. Patricia."

...What?

 _Ohhh...she's crazy._ Beth realized. Well, time to back away slowly.

"W-wait! I'm not crazy!" Patricia called out desperately. "I am your daughter! I swear!"

Beth sighed, trying to reason with her.

"How can this be true? You look like you're the same age as me. And besides, I'm pretty sure I'd remember giving birth. You probably have me mistaken for someone else, Patricia."

"N-no!" Patricia said. "I came from the future!"

"What?" Beth said in disbelief. What kind of delusional nonsense was this? Surely, the talk of a crazy person.

"I swear! I can prove it! You're my mother, Valkyrja Beth!"

Beth stopped dead in her tracks. How did she know her name? Lucky guess? But she even got the Valkyrja part right, and that part made no sense!

"You enjoy playing soccer, looking for the Yggdrasil's heart, and long walks on the beach." Patricia continue to ramble much to Beth's horror. "You also have a masochistic fetish- which you tried to hide from me, rude mother- and your three sizes are-"

"Okay, okay enough!" Beth yelped out in absolute horror. "Okay, first off none of that is true. And second, even if it is-" Beth leaned in. "Do you honestly expect me to believe what you're claiming? I don't even have a boyfriend yet!"

"Oh, but this is in the future, you see," Patricia mused on happily. "You're happily married in my time."

"O-oh God. To who? Please not Duke, please not Duke, please not Duke."

"Vitos!"

"Oh thank Go-WHAAAAAA?!"

"Wow mother, where did you think I got these horns form?"

"You're telling me I end up marrying the king of hell?!"

"Well, yes. You eventually seduced him with your womanly charms, or so I've been told."

" _I?_ Seduced _him?"  
_  
"Yeah, I mean aren't you supposed to have a crush on him by now? Hmm, did I travel too far back?"

Beth stopped to imagine herself in a wedding dress standing next to Vitos in a tuxedo. It was absolutely absurd what she was claiming, there was no way this was true!

Hmm, but the mental image of it was kind of funny. And she couldn't help but to imagine what would happen after the wedding.

"Mother...? You're drooling."

"Wha-" Beth wiped her mouth. "I am not!"

"Not anymore, obviously, since you wiped it off...Ah! Were you imagining being tied up by daddy again?"

"Wha-?! NO! Mmm, tied up? No, I'm not imagining it!"

"Okay, mother! Whatever you say! Anyway, the reason I came back in time was because-...um, mother?"

"Heeheehee. Oh my~...What? No, for the last time, I wasn't imagining it! Shut up!"

"But I wasn't saying you were. I just wanted to let you know why I traveled back in time to see you."

"Oh? Okay, carry on then." Beth said with a faraway expression.

"Right. Anyway." Patricia's face darkened. "Listen carefully mother. Once you end up marrying daddy, you have to follow what I say very closely, you understand? What I am about to tell you will change the entire fate of the galaxy as we know it. You _have_ to understand, okay?

"Right, right." Beth responded forlornly.

"Okay. Then here it is." Patricia took a deep breath. Then she wailed.

"YOU HAVE TO STOP FEEDING DADDY CAKES!"

Patricia's voice rang across the forest, startling a few birds in the process. Beth snapped back to the attention abruptly.

"...Cakes?" It was the only word she picked up.

"Yes! Please stop feeding daddy cakes." Patricia begged. "Daddy has gained so much weight lately. And he had worked so hard to stay fit too! Don't you know how hard it is to lose weight? Daddy went to the gym 5 times a day and became a contestant on the biggest loser, but he still keeps gaining weight! And it's all because you keep feeding him cakes, every time! Eventually he couldn't take it anymore, and he destroyed the whole galaxy in his anger. Don't you see? You have to stop giving him cakes, you understand? Mom?"

"Cakes...all over my body..." Beth had zoned out in her own world again, and didn't respond to what Patricia said.

"Um, I guess she got it?" Patricia shrugged. "Well, guess I better go back to the future to find out. Uh...how do I do that again?" Patricia blinked in thought, but she couldn't come with anything. "Huh, guess I'm stuck here. Oh well. Hey, Daddy's in hell right? I can go hang out with him!"

And with that Patricia left a dreamy Beth standing there and traveled to the deepest depths of hell to hang out with Vitos.

"Daddy!"

"What? Who the hell are you?"

"I'm your daughter, Patricia!"

"...What."

"And I came here to tell you, please don't eat the cakes mommy keeps baking you. You'll end up destroying the entire galaxy!"

"WHAT?!" Vitos leaned forward in his chair. "DESTROY THE GALAXY?! SOUNDS FUN! DON'T MIND IF I DO!"

"Daddy nooooooo-"

Melchior walked in at exactly the right moment.

"Not so fast, your majesty. I have 50000000000 more papers you need to sign first. You can destroy the world later."

"Aww..."

The end.


End file.
